But I will see your face in righteousness when I awake. I will be satisfied with your presence. (Psalm 17:15 CSB)
…I will be satisfied in an awakening of your likeness in me. (Psalm 17:15 TBT)
On my own spiritual winter day, I woke up to go to a yoga class, a class I so desperately needed. Unfortunately, I was running late and upon arriving at the studio, I found the doors locked. My heart was already heavy and burdened and reaching a locked yoga studio door was my breaking point. Tears welled up in my eyes as I walked back to my car…all I wanted to do now was to get back home, crawl back into bed and pull the sheets over my head. But upon entering my home, I felt a stirring in my soul to go sit with the Lord. I knew that stirring, I had felt it many times before… I knew I needed to push through my flesh and let my spirit lead. So, acting more like a toddler than an adult, I grabbed my bible and journal and sat down. Glancing at my phone a saw a text from a dear friend that didn’t have any words just a link to the song… Give me Jesus. I grabbed my ear pods, clicked the link, and closed my eyes. I let my heart hear the words of the song…I mean truly hear the words and as I did, tears streamed down my face.
“In the morning when I rise give me Jesus.
you can have all this world but give me Jesus…
And when I am alone, give me Jesus…
you can have all this world but give me Jesus…
And when I come to die, give me Jesus.
you can have all this world but give me Jesus…"
There in the darkroom on that rainy winter day, I felt His presence and His love gently centering me back on the Divine Potter’s wheel… On that day, as I sat reflecting on the words of the song, my heart’s condition was that in my spiritual winter, in the morning, I wasn’t asking for Jesus, I was asking for things of this world… And in the alone times, I wasn’t asking for Jesus, I was asking for relationships in this world to fill a gap in my heart that only He could fill… And when I thought of the day I die, would I truly say, “Give me Jesus?” I really was not in the season of my spiritual walk where I was truly satisfied in being in His presence.
I don’t know how many times I listened to the song that day or the number of tissues that I went through but what I do know is that this morning, I didn’t need yoga to be centered again …. I needed Jesus!
Reflection questions:
The questions I ask are the same ones I asked myself on that particular spiritual winter day…
1) When you rise in the morning, are you wanting Jesus?
2) When you are alone, are you content with having only Jesus?
3) And when the day comes when you will go Home, will you be saying, “Give me Jesus?”
Dear Lord, thank you that you can take a broken spirit caught walking through a spiritual winter day, catch the tears dropped, and shine warmth back into a hurting heart. Thank you, Lord, that you are the giver and sustainer of life. You are all that we truly need, no matter the season.